Game of Thrones Season 8: Her Twisted World
by The Auteur
Summary: Season 8 for Game of Thrones emphasizing Arya Stark as a main character. Arya has overcome many challenges but now she must confront the most dire struggle of her life that will decide the fate of Westeros and the future of house Stark.
1. Episode 1

Game of Thrones Season 8: Her Twisted World

Episode 1: New Beginnings

Times were rough for her, Arya Stark. She has been through much – she's been blinded and tortured by Valer Morgolus in Bravos, she was watched her family being killed right in front of her, and worst of all – she has been denied a normal life. But no longer. Now that she has returned to her ancestral home of Winterfell, things have returned to normalcy. The land now knows peace and the people prosper. Arya Stark is now starting high school in Winterfell.

Young Arya sat down in homeroom with her fellow classmates. There was the beautiful and popular Daenerys Targarian and her boyfriend, Arya's brother, Jon Snow. She saw the most popular and bitchy girl in school, Margery Tyrell, who was especially cruel to unpopular girls with no friends like Arya. You see, when Arya spent her teenaged years training in the art of the blade under the Varer Morgolus assassins of Bravos, she lost her opportunity to make friends, accrue popularity, and get an attractive boyfriend. The sight of Margery with all of her beautiful and bubbly friends as well as her hugely attractive boyfriend made Arya extremely depressed. She even started to cry a little, but not enough that she attracted the attention of the entire class. However, Margery, being the sly emotional tyrant that she is, noticed Arya's subtle change in demeanor and smirked at her dismay.

Margery's boyfriend was so alpha and hot that he sat in homeroom without a shirt on, so as to show off his huge muscles, much to the frustration of the homeroom teacher, Stannis. Stannis sat at his desk depressedly and groaned, "Put on a shirt, Chad." Chad sat back in his chair and grabbed his groan. He smirked, "Fuck off and shut the fuck up you old ass virgin. Why are are you even here? Just fucking leave already; nobody likes you lmao." The entire class save Arya erupted in laughter at Stannis' expense and began throwing things at him – even Arya's sister, Sansa. Arya was shocked to finally notice Sansa sitting by Margery and cruelly mocking the teacher along with the rest of the cool kids. Arya felt depressed and anxious at this. Sansa had betrayed her and was now one of the popular kids. Stannis went on and began a lecture on quadratic equations, though most of the class ignored him entirely, of course.

After the bell ringed and class was dismissed, Arya began roaming the hallways depressedly and hungrily. You see, since Arya's parents were murdered by the Lannisters, she was essentially homeless. Sure she could live in Winterfell castle, but the home was completely empty and there was no food there at all. Arya rarely had the chance to eat. She pattered through the hall while her pained stomach growled ravenously. She trodded aimlessly until she saw it – the janitor's closet was wide open and inside was a hamburger sitting on the desk. Arya's assassin instincts peaked and she immediately realized that this was an obvious trap but she didn't care. She was far too hungry. She rushed in and grabbed for the sandwich frantically, but her hopes were cruelly dashed when she laid a hand on it. It was paper mache – a fake!

Suddenly Arya felt a cold presence behind her. She froze up as she sensed a huge shadowy figure trapping her in the janitor's closet. Her heart sank as she realized that she was late for class and nobody would come to save her against this mysterious assailant – not ever Valer Morgolus. She would have to fend for herself, so she reached for trusty little thrusting sword, Needle. "Come here little thing. This gorilla dick daddy is hungry." grumped the fiend. He laid his huge hands on Arya's petite shoulder's and slobbered all over her hair. The man slammed Arya against the floor with inhuman strength. Arya could now see the man's face as he reached down to unzip his pants. It was Stannis. Stannis ripped Arya's pants and grunted, "Hold on, little dove, I'm coming in." Stannis reared forward and prepared to thrust in to her but he could not, as she had already thrust into him. Needle had penetrated Stannis' heart, slaying him. "W-what?! I-impossible! Hhhuuurggghhha!" moaned Stannis as he keeled over and died right away. Arya pushed the dead fiend off of her and got to her feet in the hallway with her torn clothes, leaving Stannis' bloodied corpse in the janitor's closet.

Arya felt a cold, evil presence loom beside her as she trembled for the near-rape. She glanced to the side and saw the vice president, the sinister Littlefinger Peter Baelish with a wide, devilish smile on his face. "Well well then, little miss Shtark. What a scenario you found yourself enthralled in. Hahaha." he sneered. Arya looked at him with pure terror in her young eyes. Peter grinned and continued, "You see, young Shtark, you are now in quite the pickle. I will tell everyone that you are the one who murdered Stannis in cold blood unless you complete one important task for me. And of course that task is: you must have _sex_ with me."


	2. Episode 2

Episode 2: New Faces

Peter Littlefinger was rough in bed. Arya didn't stand a chance against him. He was the beloved vice principle and everyone would have believed his account of Stannis' death over her's. Stannis was held in high regard by the other faculty of Winterfell high school and nobody would have believed that he was actually a vile pedophilic rapist instead of an innocent math teacher. And so Arya was forced to lay with Peter Littlefinger against her will. She lay there in his bed broken and distraut, her body and mind a mess. Peter sat there naked and happy as he looked upon her and saw her utter depression. He laughed and mocked her, "Haha you are so so pathetic. You were played so easily, and just so you know, this won't be the first time that you get _fucked_ by me. That's right, you _fuck_ me everyday for the rest of your miserable life or all of Winterfell will learn that you are in fact the brutal murderer of Stannis Baratheon. Now get the fuck out of my house." Arya moaned and did as she was told, for to disobey Littlefinger would mean getting expelled from school and ending up in prison and getting brutally raped there as well.

Arya stood in front of her bathroom mirror depressed and completely broken both psychologically and physically. Her thick black mascara ran down her face as she cried so hard that her tear ducts bled. Her crimson tears formed a pond of sorrow as the sheer volume of her sobbing had clogged the drain. She looked at her destroyed self and mirror and finally snapped. She shrieked and grabbed for a razor. She took it to her wrist buy she was far too shaky to cut herself. She dropped the blade into the bloodred lake of tears and shifted her gaze back to her reflection. She cried out, "FUCK!" and punched the mirror, shattering it.

The next day Arya quietly sat down in homeroom and began sucking her thumb. She ignored the usual taunts from the popular kids, even those of the bitch Margery Tyrell. However she noticed some new faces in the classroom, especially some new attractive boys. Suddenly a huge braphog waddled into the room. She was extremely portly with bright red lipstick similar to the braphod who sits in the front of Burlington Bar reaction videos. The braphog spoke in a chirpy voice, "Hello class, I am your new homeroom teacher, Ms. Curtis! I'm sorry to hear what happened to your last teacher but don't worry kids, the faculty is currently doing its best to investigate the murder and bring those responsible to justice. If you need counseling, don't hesitate to see vice principal Peter Littlefinger." Arya cringed. Braphog Ms. Curtis continued, "Now, in other news, we have some new students. Please introduce yourselves!" Two attractive young, ebony-haired japanese-looking boys stood in front of the class next to the braphog, Ms. Curtis.

The first boy with striking red eyes spoke gruffly, "My name's Sasuke Uchiha. Don't bother me, losers. That's all." He scoffed and sat down in an extremely alpha manner. Arya blushed at that. The other boy stood there with a massive bulge in his pants. Arya saw and blushed. The boy noticed her reaction and winked at her. Arya got a nosebleed and shrunk back into her chair as she squealed. He spoke up, "My name's Kirito and my goal is to become the most popular boy in school. Now, of course, in order to that, I need to find out who the current most popular boy is and beat the shit out of him." Jon Snow stood up with a stern countenance and proclaimed, "That would be me, sir. I accept your challenge to a duel. May the best man win." Kirito leapt up and did a flying kick which instantly connected to Jon Snow's face. The bastard of Winterfell went flying backwards and slammed into the wall. The entire class gasped in unison. "You cocky bastard!" yelled Jon Snow as he drew his Valyrian steel sword, Longclaw and lunged for Kirito. Kirito scoffed, "Pssh an amateur move!" as he drew his dual swords and spun like a helicopter through the room towards Snow. Longclaw was cut in half by Kirito's black sword, as his other broke through Jon's guard and severed his hand. Jon collapsed to the floor, utterly beaten and bloody. Jon ran out of the room, crying and disgraced.

The class was in awe as everyone crowded around Kirito in wonder. Even the braphog Ms. Curtis was dumbfounded. Arya saw Daenerys cuddling up to Kirito. She, as the alpha female and most popular girl in school would most definitely become his girlfriend now. All of the class celebrated besides the misfit outsiders, Arya and Sasuke, who sat in the back of class. Sasuke looked over to Arya, "Why don't we ditch these losers and hang out under the bleachers?" Arya was shocked at his straightforwardness but wholeheartedly accepted, "S-sure."

Arya and Sasuke were perfect for each other, both being downtrodden outcasts who have experienced much loss and sadness in their short lives. They got along well and laughed together as they ate a meal that Sasuke had prepared. Suddenly a pathetic little hall monitor overheard them and rushed up to interrupt them. He shrieked in a nasally, wimpy little voice. "GET THE HECK TO CLASS NOW! RIGHT NOW!" Sasuke laughed at him and mocked, "Haha no. Get lost, loser!" The hall monitor roared autistically and shoved Sasuke, but his pathetic little push didn't budge the muscular Sasuke, who promptly cast Tsukuyomi on the little dweeb before punching him in the mouth. The hall monitor screamed and ran away sobbing. Later, as the sun was setting Sasuke and Arya were still giggling together under the bleachers as the Sauce started fondling Arya. Arya panicked and pushed him away. "What's the matter?" asked Sasuke. "Sadly I'm only allowed to have sex with one man, Peter Littlefinger. You see, if I don't _fuck_ him like he asks, then he will tell everyone that I killed Stannis. Well, I did kill Stannis, but it was in self-defense." she replied. "That's seriously messed up." Sasuke said, "Why don't I just go beat the shit out of him?"

Later that night, as Peter Littlefinger was walking home, expecting to mount Arya that night. Suddenly, he was caught in a Tsukuyomi and woke up from the painful genjutsu only to find Sasuke beating the shit out of him. Sasuke throttled Peter Littlefinger until was throughly bloodied and near death. Peter Littlefinger sat up with almost no teeth left and two black eyes. Sasuke held a katana to his throat and uttered these words: "You are never to even look at Arya Stark again. You will never have _sex_ with her again and you will tell no one that she killed Stannis. You are to travel across the Narrow Sea. There you shall seek out the mythical land of apothecaries and alchemists, Yore. Once you have discovered the lost Kingdom of Yore, you shall solicit the services of one of its wise men and acquire a potion or elixir that shall restore the virginity of Lady Arya Stark which you unjustly robbed from her. Failure to follow these instructions will result in me beating the shit out of you forever – until you die."

Peter solemnly frowned and nodded to the young Uchiha, reluctantly accepting his terms.


	3. Episode 3

Episode 3: The Deliverance of Ms. Curtis

"Fucking pathetic little gremlin!" hollered Margery Tyrell as she saw Arya walking confidently towards homeroom with her books in hand. Arya didn't even look at her as she strode down the hall with her head held high. Margery lunged and slapped poor Arya across the face, but Arya didn't even react to her pathetic gesture. She simply turned the other cheek and took it. Frustrated, Margery groaned as Arya just walked past her. Arya's life was going too well to bother with things as petty as Margery. She had been freed from the shackles of Peter Littlefinger and she would soon receive a virginity potion that would allow her to have sex for the first time with her new love, Sasuke Uchiha. The morning was great, and Arya would soon be sitting in class with her favorite teacher, the braphog Ms. Curtis.

Homeroom was bizarre. The lights were all off and an awful, pungent odor permeated the air. It was pitch black, but everyone navigated to their seats through muscle memory. Margery sat with her boyfriend, Chad by Daenerys and her new lover, Kirito. Arya, of course, sat with her beloved, Sasuke. Despite the odd circumstances, everyone was just as lively as ever. Daenerys relished in her popularity, Margery taunted the less popular girls, Chad bullied the ugly ass virgin Sam Tarly, and Arya giggled with Sasuke. Unbeknownst to Arya, her world was about to turn upside down and her thick black mascara was going to be running down her face.

Suddenly, everyone in the class was alerted by the sudden entrance of a large masculine figure entering the room who suddenly flicked the lights on. To the horror of the class, at the teacher's desk in the front of the room sat the brutally murdered body of Ms. Curtis. She was missing an eyeball and her clothes were torn. Blood stained the floor and walls of the entire room. There was mysterious bodily fluids everywhere and the braphog Ms. Curtis had obviously been raped as her pants had been torn from her. Her fat rolls had been chopped and a huge pile of shredded human flesh and pus had formed beneath her.

Everyone was aghast. Arya started sobbing – her thick black mascara ran down her face as she recoiled back into Sasuke's arms. Chad jolted, "WHAT THE FUCK!" and Kirito stood up suddenly and assertively so as to protect his girlfriend. Hanako shrieked loudly, so loud in fact that she startled other students with her reaction. "Now now. Calm down class.: commanded the man gruffly. Arya's eyes shifted to him. He was a tall man in a trench coat with a police badge. He was an anthropomorphic talking tanuki. "My name is Mr. Nakamoto," he said, "I'm a detective."

School was closed for a week and the school board was in disarray as the budget was strained in paying for counseling for all of the students. Everyone was to have a private, one-on-one interview with Mr. Nakamoto to assist him in finding the monster who was responsible for taking the life of Ms. Curtis. After a few days, it was Arya's turn. The lights were blinding above her as Arya sat across from the tanuki. He spoke, "So, what do you know? Did you see what happened? Do you have any idea who could have done this?" Arya responded, "I have no idea. I just went to class like everyone else. I only found out that Ms. Curtis was dead when you turned the lights on." Mr. Nakamoto looked inquisitive as took notes and spoke to Arya, "Ah, I see. I see..." Suddenly Arya sat up confidently. "Mr. Nakamoto," she boldly declared, "I would like to be a part of the investigation!" Nakamoto gruffed, "Hmph. That could be arranged, but I'm afraid that you, Arya Stark, are a suspect in this investigation!"

Arya recoiled back in fright and peed herself a little, "W-what?!" "Don't worry, you aren't the prime suspect, but you must answer some key questions." Arya was slightly relieved and responded, "Oh okay." "First," Nakamoto queried, "Have you ever worn a wooden prosthetic penis?" "No! Of course not!" barked Arya. "Ah I see," replied Nakamoto, "Then you are therefore cleared of suspicion." "Thank god!" yelped Arya.

"Now that you a part of the investigatory team, I have some key details of the case that I must share with you." Nakamoto said. Arya sat attentively. He continued, "Firstly I must tell you that the lead investigator of the case is a mysterious detective known only as L. He is extremely intelligent and conducted an autopsy of Ms. Curtis' remains. You see, based on injuries to Curtis' orifices, the original coroner concluded that the suspect must be male with an uncommonly large penis. However, when reviewing these findings, L deduced that the injuries could actually have been caused by a large wooden prosthetic penis, so we cannot immediately rule out females as the culprit."

Arya was utterly enthralled with the details of the case. Nakamoto went on, "Additionally, Ms. Curtis was a former member of the terrorist organization known as Kaihō (解放) (Author's note: Kaihō means 'liberation'). The group was dedicated to overthrowing the Japanese government and the establishment of an authoritarian regime. Ms. Curtis was a die hard member until she got spooked and became a police informant when the organization's leader, Himiko began using more brutal and inhumane tactics. We suspect that Kaihō assassinated her and covered it up as a rape so as to avoid drawing media attention to the organization's activities."

Arya gasped at this revelation as Mr. Nakamoto continued his monologue, this time while grinning menacingly, "You see, your classmate who I interviewed earlier, Hanako, works at a woodworking shop. She explained to me that there was an extremely bizarre order that they fulfilled recently. An eighteen inch-long wooden penis. The customer who ordered this item was a recent Japanese immigrant, none other than Sasuke Uchiha." Arya's eyes widened into the size of dinner plates as her heart sunk. Suddenly, two police officers burst into the room – one was an anthropomorphic bulldog and the other was an anthropomorphic german shepherd. They swiftly placed handcuffs on Arya's tiny wrists. Nakamoto stood up and declared with an authoritative fervor, "Arya Stark, you under arrest under the suspicion that you aided and abetted the murderer of Ms. Curtis, Sasuke Uchiha! L will decide your fucking fate!" "NO!" Arya frantically screeched as the policemen dragged her off.


	4. Episode 4

Episode 4: Despair

Arya was furious. She and her beloved had been framed for the murder of her favorite schoolteacher, her mentor, the braphog Ms. Curtis. She was outraged at Nakamoto and L for enforcing this injustice. She hated the terrorists of Liberation. To her, Himiko was the Great Satan who had just ruined her life. Lastly, she blamed Hanako for getting Sasuke in to this mess. Arya sat there in the police car sobbing, her thick black mascara mixing with her bloody tears as it ran down her face forming a puddle of dark crimson sorrow on the floor of the vehicle. Suddenly, she sprang to action.

Arya wiped the tears off of her face on her shoulder and taunted the policemen, "Fuck you both! Traitors!" and backflipped out of the back window of the car. (The burlington bar will cheer at this uproariously, especially the braphog who sits in the front with the thick red lipstick.) She did six somersaults in mid air and landed on her feet a good 10 yards away. She pivoted and sprinted into an alley. The policemen attempted to give chase, but Arya was the parkour master of Winterfell. She knew the entire city inside-out from her childhood parkour experience. (Don't you remember when she learned to be agile and dexterous by chasing the cat in season 1? What a quirky and cool character Arya is.) The police were no match for Arya's inhuman speed and climbing abilities; she was more fleeting than the wind itself. As, Arya retrieved her trusty sword needle from its hiding place and sawed off her handcuffs with it, only one thing ran through her usually extremely complex and analytical mind: she must get to Sasuke before L does.

Much later, Sasuke was casually making a gourmet dinner for himself when the window above his sink was smashed in. Arya came through the window and gracefully landed on her two feet. "Whoa, I wasn't expecting you babe!" exclaimed Sasuke. "There's no time babe, we have to get out of here! The cops are coming!" yelled Arya. Sasuke was stunned, "Slow down! What do you mean?!" Arya barked, "They're coming for you!" Sasuke gasped and dropped to his knees. He uttered, "So, it's finally caught up to me. They've found out." He drew his sword and prepared to commit seppuku. As he lunged to thrust the sword into his belly, Arya jumped in the way of it.

Sasuke abruptly stopped the blade before it pierced Arya's bosom. "What the hell are you doing?!" shouted Arya. "I can't live with myself!" screamed Sasuke, "THEY KNOW WHAT I DID!" "NO! It's not true! You've been brainwashed!" Arya exclaimed with every ounce of vigor in her body. Sasuke sighed and shifted his visage towards the ground. Utterly dejected and broken, he admitted, "I... raped... Naruto."

Arya thrust her head up into the air and screamed in agony, "NO!" Sasuke spoke, "Believe it or not, it's true. I regret it, and everything I've done up until now has been to atone for my sin. In the land that I come from, I am disparaged and my reputation has been tarnished. I am disgraceful. There I am known as Sasuke the Sinner. Now word of my deeds have reached those in power here in Westeros. It's poetic, I guess. You can never escape the consequences of your sins."

"You can change!" exclaimed Arya. "I have," stated Sasuke, "and I cannot atone for my sin. I must face the consequences." "The police aren't after you for raping Naruto, you've been framed by Himiko as the murderer of Ms. Curtis." Sasuke sighed depressedly, "It doesn't matter. I will bear the weight of that sin too. I would bear all of the sins in the world if that's what it takes to release me from my guilt. I'm going to turn myself in to L. Hopefully all of these sins will die with me." "No!" shrieked Arya. "Don't try to convince me otherwise. I've made up my mind completely. My purpose in life is to face punishment for not only my own sins, but the sins of others as well." uttered Sasuke with a mortal sense of finality as he walked solemnly towards the front door. Flashing red and blue lights shone through the windows.

Arya was utterly dejected and mentally lost. She sat in a small lake of her own blood-red tears mixed with her thick black mascara. She gazed at Sasuke's young, immaculate visage one last time before crawling into the dark bathroom. With the last of her strength, Arya lifted herself up to the sink and gazed into the darkness of the mirror. She swallowed, and with a shrill, defeated voice she spoke, "Bloody Mary. Bloody Mary. Bloody Mary."

Suddenly a horrifying, gory phantom holding a huge blood-soaked dagger appeared in the mirror. It reached out and, with an unnatural force, slit Arya's throat. The girl collapsed to the floor. Her eyes became pale and glassy like milkglass as life faded from her.


	5. Episode 5

Episode 5: On the Edge

Sasuke heard Arya flop on the floor helplessly gasping for breath. He rushed into the bathroom and with an inhuman fervor, he cried out, "Arya! No!" Thinking quickly, he saw Bloody Mary and came up with a strategy. Instead of engaging her, he stood there menacingly and activated his sharingan. He unsheathed his katana and entered the edgiest pose he could. In this moment, Sasuke exhumed so much edge that it is impossible to describe with mere prose or human language in general. Bloody Mary took one look at Sasuke and clutched her chest in agony. Her feeble old eyes absorbed only a tiny iota of Sasuke's edge, but it was far too much for even an immortal being to endure. She let out a disturbed, ghostly wail and fell to the floor a crumpled mess. Sasuke punched the mirror and the phantom was dispelled as the glass shattered all over the floor. The broken glass scattered across the bloodied floor and reflected the amber light of the candles that Arya had set across the room. The floor was a crimson pond with streaks of thick black mascara and incandescent glass crystals. Sasuke gazed upon the phenomenal lake of sorrow, and in the center of it all, he saw Arya, a fallen angel near death.

Sasuke knelt down and lifted the wounded Arya up. He uttered, "When angels are forced out of heaven, they become devils. You agree don't you, my beloved?" Arya gargled blood as Sasuke wrapped bandages around her throat. She spoke softly, "This is all a bad dream that I'll never wake up from." Sasuke drew his katana and solemnly confided to Arya, "I'll wake you up right now, if that is your wish. Then we can die together." Arya nodded. With his love's approval, Sasuke laid down on top of Arya and skewered both himself and her with his ebony-hilted sword. Both lovers coughed up a torrent of blood. As the life left their eyes, they felt peace. They both felt their minds fade as all of their memories and thoughts went black. And then they died.


	6. Episode 6

Episode 6: Rebirth

Through the blackness, young Arya saw sultry sunshine. Her eyes opened to a blinding light. She gasped loudly and began panting frantically. She sat up in a sweat and felt tubes all over her body. She realized that she was laying in a hospital bed. She had survived. However she felt something off about herself – she had been raped! "Who could have raped me?" she wondered as an old scruffy looking man in a white coat entered the room. "Good evening, Ms. Stark. You have been sleeping for quite a while. Two weeks in fact."

Arya screamed out, "What about Sasuke?!" The doctor grinned slightly and quelled her, "Don't worry little dove. He has already been released from the hospital. Both of you had some very nasty stab wounds and lascerations. It's a miracle that you survived. You are a very lucky girl." Arya felt like a titanic weight had been lifted off her, like she had just been granted entrance into elysium. Her visage lighted up and she had to strain to stop herself from audibly yelping in joy. That is, until she looked down at herself. She began shaking terribly as she felt her a great change in her body. Horrifyingly, her stomach had been made big with child!

"Would you like an abortion my deary?" pondered the old doctor. Arya lept up out of the bed and yelped excitedly, "Yep! Yep! Gimme! Gimme! Me want abortion!" The doctor snapped his fingers and a nurse and a chansey (that thick pink pokemon with the egg) came in wheeling a strange machine. The contraption was a huge iron box completely adorned with cogs and screws; it had a huge hose with a plunger head and a pipe coming off the top of it – similar to a chimney. The medical staff worked swiftly and without delay, they had obviously carried out this procedure many times – clearly in an impromptu fashion. The nurse and the pokemon each grabbed one of Arya's legs and stretched them out to the side as the old doctor affixed the plunger to Arya's groan. "All ready?" asked the doctor. Arya smirked and eagerly gave him a thumbs up. "Okay!" he cheered as he pulled down on a bright red lever.

Suddenly, the machine's gears began to turn and it let out a great sucking sound. Arya gasped as she felt a huge mass being pulled from her body. Strangely, she felt no pain, only a sense of great relief and lightness – a similar feeling to releasing a large volume of stool. Her stomach flattened as a wide lump traveled through the hose. The sound a young baby crying could be heard as the mass was pulled into the machine. Abruptly a great, jarring grinding noise could be heard, which abated the wails of the newborn babe, and a stream of chunky red mist was blown out of the top of the machine. The medical staff was jubilant as they all applauded. "The operation," remarked the doctor, "has been a complete success." With that, Arya let out a sigh of relief.

As the nurses cleaned the room and the doctor turned to leave the room, he stopped and looked to the now blissful Arya. "I just remebered," he said, "Someone is going to come visit you now. That police detective, L. What a strange name that he has." Arya scowled. Soon thereafter, a thin, unkempt man with messy dark hair and bags under his eyes dispassionately trotted into the room barefoot. He was unmistakable – Arya knew that he was the famous detective, L because the doctor had explained that L would be coming in to see her in the previous sentence. Arya frowned deeply and asked him, "Are you L?" the man shifted his gaze to the newly unpregnent Arya and spoke, "No, I am not L." Arya looked nervous and queried, "Really?" The man giggled and hastily responded, "No, just kidding. I am L." (Author's note: L theme song starts playing here)

Arya was enraged at L, who had ordered the police to arrest her and her beloved boyfriend. She began hissing like a disturbed viper. L coughed and hollered, "Gentlemen, I could use a little muscle in here." Suddenly, Mr. Nakamoto and an old, mustached-man rushed into the room. Arya let out a pained scream and violently lunged for L. The two men were too fast for Arya, as her speed had been slightly diminished from her two week-long coma and abortion procedure that she had undergone mere moments ago. They restrained Arya and strapped her down onto her hospital bed with belts. Arya kept struggling and cussing at L, so Mr. Nakamoto drew a billy club and struck Arya on the shin. Unfortunately for the policemen, this only made her more violent. Arya's outburst began to intensify to an almost inhuman level. Her eyes were bloodshot as she swore viciously at L and the gruff tanuki. Her voice began to sound like that of the possessed girl from _The Exorcist_.

"Enough!" boldly exclaimed Nakamoto and he bludgeoned Arya across the face with his club, giving her a black eye. "Ow!" screeched Arya in her usual sweet voice. The blow seemed to at least partially pacify her. L spoke to the mustached-man, "Watari, will you please fetch us some popsicles?" The old Watari stood to attention like a trained soldier. He immediately and dutifully replied, "At once, my lord." L looked to the now sobbing Arya as her bloody tears mixed with her thick black mascara, streaming down her face, "I apologize sincerely for our rudeness. You see, Mr. Nakamoto here usually plays the role of bad cop while my manservant Watari plays the role of good cop. They are an extraordinarily effective duo." Minutes later, Watari had returned with chocolate and pistachio ice cream cones. L's demeanor changed abruptly. He sprang out of his seat and cried out, "I demanded popsicles, not this disgusting shit!" as he tore the billy club out of Nakamoto's paw and clobbered Watari in the face, breaking his nose. The loyal Watari took his punishment stoicly and explained, "My apologies, sir, but there were no popsicles available in the hospital cafeteria. Only ice cream was available." L disappointingly grabbed an ice cream from Watari's hand and slumped back into his chair. Arya could see a single bloody tear run down L's face.


	7. Episode 7

Episode 7: Intrigue

Arya closed her eyes as Watari used a rag to wipe the blood-red tears and mascara from her face. As she opened them, she watch the old manservant hurry across the room to do the same to L. "So," L said, "in regards to the investigation, I would like to inform you that this was all a test. A test to measure your love and loyalty to Sasuke and I would like to announce that you passed with flying colors. You see, I have already deduced that Himiko framed Sasuke for the murder of Ms. Curtis. Seeing that you both attempted suicide shows that you will stand by Sasuke's side to the bitter end and you can be trusted to assist us in this investigation." Arya wriggled around excitedly on her blood-stained bed and yelped for joy.

L continued, "Furthermore, we have determined that your classmate Hanako is likely a cover for Himiko herself, or perhaps she is Himiko's twin sister and accomplice. Either way, she must be arrested and brought to justice. There is a problem with this however, the Japanese government wants her to be killed quietly. They even hired an assassin to do the job. We need to get to Hanako before he does, so that we can ensure that the Liberation terrorists face justice in a legitimate court of law. Unfortunately for us, however, we have absolutely no evidence of any wrongdoing on her behalf. Therefore, you and Sasuke will have to find out something quickly, or you can simply frame her for the crime that we know that she actually did commit." Watari presented a large briefcase, which he promptly laid on Arya's bedside table before opening it.

Inside the case, Arya saw an 36 inch-long, blood-stained wooden penis. "This is the murder weapon." claimed Nakamoto as he lifted the stick up in his paw. "A yard long, double-reinforced, and made with Australian bull-oak ironwood. Very expensive and dangerous. Poor braphog didn't stand a chance." spoke Watari. L looked Arya in the eyes sternly, "You are to get an invitation to Hanako's slumber party. Once inside her home, you are to place the murder weapon in her panty drawer. This task is absolutely paramount. Do you understand?" Arya beamed with a newfound determination and exclaimed, "Yes sir!" Watari packed the wooden penis back into the case and locked it close before handcuffing the breifcase to Arya's left wrist. Nakamoto gruffed, "Gotta make sure you don't lose it."

The next day, Arya lugged the large briefcase into class. She sat down in the back of class in her usual spot. To her shock, Sasuke was nowhere to be seen. She began sweating and crying blood. She even peed a little. Suddenly, she noticed in the corner of her eye that Watari was standing in the back of the room right next to her. He leaned over quickly and whispered in Arya's ear, "Sasuke can't be here right now because Hanako thinks that he's in jail!" "Oh!" Arya said out-loud, relieved. Arya gazed upon the class. The three coolest girls in school were all sitting together. There was the renowned Dynyrys Tyrgyryyn sitting with her hot boyfriend Kirito. Along side her was the cruel Margery Tyrell and, of course, Hanako, the third coolest girl in Winterfell High and widely considered to be the most popular and attractive asian person in all of Westeros. There was no way that she would get the chance to attend the slumber party that night. She was nowhere near popular enough. She slumped over and began to faintly cry tears of blood.

Arya was depressed all day. She strained to slug around that heavy briefcase all day for nothing. She sat in a bathroom stall for the duration of the schoolday, sobbing out a crimson lake of sorrow. Near the end of the last period, mere minutes before the final bell, another girl came into the bathroom and sat down to piss in the stall next to Arya. The girl began to sing one of the Japanese songs from Naruto Shippuden out loud. Under normal circumstances, Arya would laugh at how cringy that situation was, but this time she recognized the gentle voice of her classmate, Hanako. Arya knocked on the side of the stall three times and called out, "Are you there, Hanako-san?" After moment of deafening silence, Arya heard a reply from the girl, "I'm here."

"So, Hanako-san," Arya spoke in Japanese that she had learned from Sasuke, "I have a proposition that I would sincerely like you to consider." "What is it Arya-chan?" replied Hanako-san in Japanese. Arya spoke, "There is a grave threat in your future. I will tell you what it is, but only on the condition that you allow me to attend you slumber party tonight." There was a pause, and then Hanako finally spoke up, "Very well." Arya swallowed and explained, "The Japanese government has dispatched an assassin to take your life. You should get a bodyguard, such as me, to protect you. I am very good with a sword as I trained under Valar Morgolus in Bravos you know." Hanako solemnly replied, "Thank you very much for this information. I look forward to seeing you tonight." She stood up and flushed the toilet as the final bell tolled. Arya got up, though her backside was sore from sitting on the toilet all day. As she left the bathroom, Arya saw something on the floor of Hanako's stall: a blood splatter.


End file.
